Boro Match Report

Late yet again but I have just recovered.....

Due to Darren Feasey bottling the “derby-day” experience, Pete Carr joined the three amigos; Chris, Ash and myself on a mini adventure to Middlesbrough to see if we could finally get an eagerly awaited Premiership win under Mick McCarthy. Collected from Castle Kenny at 12.30pm by the legend that is Alan “I’m a Geordie steward at the Boro” Neasham, we were (yet again) told to bring 3 points back. We can’t promise them any more, its not like we’re going to Crewe or Burnley anymore. We hit the A177 in high spirits, although Chris and I were feeling very rough from a previous nights drinking in Durham. Ash was fresh from 45 minutes of Sunday League football and Carr was eager to get a Stella down his neck. Neasham put his Elvis CD on which was threatening to dampen morale but we soon arrived at the Fighting Cocks in Middleton St George where 3 Stella’s and a John Smiths were subsequently demolished. Couple of pints, a bit of bait and a short trip down the A66 later we were in Smog Territory, a pub that’s in the town (can’t remember the name) but we had a couple more and got a taxi to drop us off within walking distance to the stadium…walking distance? Yeah right, it would have been a good idea to bring the dog, as it’s a decent walk from Redcar... Due to the intoxication (of Stella, not the area for once) we are fancying an away win – not for the first time this season either but drinking stella doesn’t half give you Red n White eyes. We’re in the “stadium” for 3.40pm, kick-off is 20 minutes time. We see Clive, get another pint in and Chris puts a fiver on the Lads to win @ 5/1. As soon as we take our seat we are straight back up on our feet rejoicing as Tommy Miller has lashed home on 83 seconds. All I saw was the ball bouncing off the post and nestling nicely in the Boro net. Get in there!! 1-0, can we hang on for the next 89 minutes?? I’m heading every ball with Breeny and Caldwell as they stood resolute at the back, the Boro lads weren’t up for the fight and they have a player called Rochemback who wouldn’t get a game for Kelloe Club. Second half, and after another pint and some derisory chants at the Boro fans about paedophilia we were soon awarded a free-kick 20 yards out. Our seats are directly behind the goal, 14 rows back (excellent seats), Chris tells me I should video this free kick on my mobile. I disagree "as we never score free-kicks”, 5 seconds later we are jumping for joy as Julio Arca has quite exquisitely bent the ball over the wall into the top corner. “Easy, easy, easy, easy!!” is the cry – never sang that for ages – we’re beating the Smoggies 2-0, 30 minutes to hang on… George Boateng is doing his best to injure one of the Lads but they smile at him, Maccarone has a go at Justin Hoyte – he too just laughs at him. But, the overall hilarity of the day was in stoppage-time where Julio teases Maccarone, like a Matador teasing a raging bull – there’s only one winner as the raging bull is plonked on to his Italian arse. The Prince of Argentina has excelled himself today, so too has Kelvin Davis in goal who made a couple of outstanding first half saves. The game finishes, the Boro “crowd” are already long gone and we leave the ground. The coppers tell us it isn’t a good idea for us to go back to the town and theres some angry Smogs wating, so after a brief chat with TV star Clive we jump on the Sedgefield bus. A few abusive text messages later we are outside the Crosshills pub for 6.55pm. We agree to go for “a couple” with Clive to celebrate before we head back to Durham. The place is bouncing, Karaoke/Disco is the future, the Stella is into the double figures, dancing the night away with Clive and the lads, happy days indeed – we give Durham a big miss and just stay there in Sedgefield. Home for Match of the Day 2, and I celebrate each goal like I was there again. I somehow make my bait for work the next day, and retire for the night knowing I am going to have the hangover from hell but I know it’s gonna be worth it. I knew our day would come, West Brom knocked us down but we got straight back up and we twatted the Boro where it hurts. Good on you Mick McCarthy, thanks for making what is always a good day into an absolutely superb day. Bring on the magpies!!!