Premiership Preview

Great article in today's Sunday Times. Extensive review of each Premiership team then a prediction of where they will finish and, for a bit fun, "If they were a soap star they would be .....". Here's what it says.

Chelski
Prediction: 1st.
Manager sack rating: 1 hatchet
Comments: Who says money can't buy you happiness?
Soap star comparison: Coronation Street's Richard Hillman - Will murder everyone in sight.

Mags
Prediction: 9th
Manager sack rating: 4 hatchets (top rating with O'Leary)
Comments: Should be top six but they urgently need a replacement for the ageing Alan Shearer
Soap star comparison: Coronation Street's duelling Jack and Vera Duckworth - all those hilarious domestic squabbles

Smogs
Prediction: 6th
Manager sack rating: 2 hatchets
Comments: Steve Gibson, the poor man's Abramovich, deserves better reward for his munificence, and it is time McClaren delivered.
Saop star comparison: Coronation Street's mousey Gail Platt - People forget they're here, despite having hung around for aeons.

Man Ure
Prediction: 2nd
Manager sack rating: 3 hatchets
Comments: Beset by problems at the moment but their cast list is impressively strong - on paper at least.
Soap star comparison: Emmerdales Sadie King - glitz on the surface, machiavellian intrigue behind the scenes.

Sunderland
Prediction: 16th
Manager sack rating: 2 hatchets
Comments: Great support, excellent manager, dodgy players.
Soap star comparison: The entire cast of El Dorado - won't be with us for too long.

They have Fulham, West Brom and Wigan going down with West Ham 17th and us 16th.